(This is what a trip to the Bible bookstore does to me.)
Get Rich Quick Bible
God wants you to be rich and this Bible shows you how in 15 easy steps! Being poor is a bore! You gotta name it and claim it. God wants you in that Mercedes and McMansion and only your weak faith stands in the way.
Joel Osteen Study Bible
Joel’s smiley mug is on the cover! A smiley face marks all three of the significant passages that Osteen preaches from. You won’t be able to help but smile, be a good person, and be happy after reading this. 987 pages (10 pages of Bible, 977 of Joel’s uplifting articles).
Democrat Bible (Blue Letter Edition)
Words of Christ in BLUE! This Bible emphasize all the social issues so important to the Democrat Party. Passages about the evils of judging are marked with a donkey. Articles by Al Gore, Nancy Pelosi, and the Clintons.
From the gun-toting, flag-waving Elephant on the cover to the Voter Instruction Guide after the maps, this new Bible will keep you faithful and help you to save America from the liberals. Removes all the same passages that Thomas Jefferson removed from his Bible. Articles by Limbaugh, Donald Wildmon, Pat Buchanan, and Glen Beck.
Cheap Grace Bible
No mention of commands, requirements, expectations at all! This lovely Bible is NT only (making it lighter to carry) and leaves out any teaching on discipleship or judgment. Enjoy the blessings of God with none of the guilt-inducing statements about Holy Living. It comes with a rubber binding and no sharp edges for your safety. You won’t even have to worry about paper cuts with this Bible thanks to thicker than average paper.
Arminian-Charismatic-Gay-Green Party Montana-Born Study Bible
The perfect Bible for that unique blend that is so hard to shop for.
Baptist/Church of Christ Marriage Bible
For those mixed denomination couples that are tired of arguing. This Bible only contains the passages you agree upon, except for Ephesians 5, which is included. Removes any condemnation of instrumental music-you won’t even notice it’s gone!
The Emergent Bible
Contains only blank pages so you can become part of God’s conversation!
What new Bibles are you aware of?