He shows up randomly. Months or years pass in between. The common denominator is that he needs money. Money for food, bus tickets, something. We (our church) have helped him a lot and are happy to do it We love him without trusting him. He has been very honest about some things like an addiction.
Recently he showed up twice in a short period of time. Both times were bad for me. Busy days. Lots to do. I helped him but while trying to hide my bad attitude and impatience. He called two days later for more help and we had to say no at that point. He was silent on the phone, stunned, angry, or at least disappointed. Haven’t heard since and I suspect he will be going to his other options for awhile until those wells run dry.
These thoughts are not about benevolence or this man. This experience makes me think about God.
I wonder how he feels when I only show up or call on him when I need something. And does it annoy Him that we wait until the situation reaches crisis level, when all problems can be better helped before letting them go too far?
I also wonder if he ever does good begrudgingly. I seriously doubt it.