Thank you, God, for Guns!

“Our Father in Heaven,

Of all the God-given rights we enjoy as Americans, one of my favorites may just be GUNS!!  Thankyouthankyouthankyou.

Father, I like to have scripture engraved on all of mine to honor You.  My favorite is “Thou shalt not steal” from Exodus 20:15.  I want to be able to read it to the loser who tries to steal my wallet or my car (which are also God-given blessings, thanks) right before I pop a cap in his ugly face.

Help me, O God, to defend my blessings and family, which I am also grateful for.  While you and Jesus take care and protect me spiritually, I will be sure to take care of my family with my guns.  Really, it frees you up to do other things, like get the bad guys in other countries and bless the NRA.

I promise to only use my guns when necessary, when someone REALLY makes me angry or endangers my life, my family or my possessions.  Lord, I only get angry about a few things like immigrants taking American jobs, the government taking Americans’ guns, people who don’t love guns….you know….people who don’t love America.  I am sure you understand.

As your good book says, “better them than me” and “the way of the Cross is self-defense.”

I thank you for the freedom you gave Americans.  And I know you never want that freedom to be taken away.

So, again, Father, I thank you for my guns.  I thank you for allowing me to stash over 4,000 rounds inside of my walls and in the shelter for when that time comes. I thank you for the beautiful diversity of automatic and semi-automatic weapons you have blessed mankind to create.

I thank you for the great forefathers such as Brothers Gatling, Smith, Wesson, Colt, and Browning.  May they rest in peace.

Lord, Jesus, Praise Your Name and thank you for guns!”

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8 thoughts on “Thank you, God, for Guns!

  1. Luk 6:29 And unto him that smiteth thee on the [one] cheek offer also the other; and him that taketh away thy cloke forbid not [to take thy] coat also.

  2. Allan Miller

    If we’re trading Bible verses divorced from context or discussion: Ex 22:2; Lk 22:36, 38; Ps 144:1; Ps 18:34.

    Is it wrong to kill someone who is in the act of threatening to kill my family for material goods? Would it have been wrong for Jesus’ disciples to protect themselves from “men of violence” on that road? Is it inconsistent be be both charitable and humble in your day-to-day activities but be willing and prepared to “rescue the weak and needy” from the wicked? Is all physical self-defense wrong? I wish I was as black-and-white self-assured as you sound on this topic.

    BTW, more guns = less violence.

  3. I am not opposed to gun ownership or anti 2nd Amendment (altho I don’t view it as a moral/Christian issue so I prob wouldn’t fight for it either). I am not against hunting, owning guns etc.

    This silly piece was about Christians who love guns so much. I feel a little uncomfortable with that, for some it’s more than a hobby, and connected with violence, and that’s just my opinion.

    Which studies show that more guns = less violence? Some nations in Europe have less guns and less violence. Prob other factors involved but your equation isn’t universal.

    I am not as black and white as I appear. I would probably kill someone threatening my family, but that doesn’t mean I think it is right. It sounds noble, but ……

    Is all physical self-defense wrong? not necessarily, but our culture goes to the other extreme of assuming it’s always right and the line of self-defense and revenge is blurred on the individual and national level.

  4. forgot to mention this was inspired by a preacher who I like but probably respect less after seeing fotos posted with Bibles and Guns together. Kinda creeped me out.

    here’s my concern about guns and self-defense:
    Everybody has a plan until they get punched in the face–Mike Tyson

    you can be all about gun safety, self-defense only, extreme circumstances, until you are scared and someone wants to bash your head in. and you decide you have to take a life, when if you didn’t have a gun, you might find another way out besides taking a life.

  5. Allan, more guns, less violence hasnt happened in Australia… we have fewer guns than prior to the Port Arthur massacre (1996) and less violence.

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